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welcome
I'm Amy. I'm growing up. And this is my past, present, and future.
I know you'll come in the night like a thief.
But I’ve had some time alone to hone my lying technique.
I know you think that I’m someone you can trust.
But I’m scared I’ll get scared and I swear I’ll try to nail you back up.
So do you think that we could work out a psalm?
So I’ll know it's you and that it's over so I won't even try.
I know you'll come for the people like me.
But we all got wood and nails,
And talk dirt at hating factories.
profile
My name is Amy. I'm a Gemini. I'm 25 years old. I'm a struggling artist, and an overly opinionated martyr of my beliefs. My past experiences, no matter how petty or dramatic they were, molded me into who I am today. I'm still changing every day.
I'm an artist. I love to draw and make things in photoshop [such as this blogger layout]. I also love music; I dabble in piano a little bit. I only know how to play other songs, of course. Nothing original. I like to write as well. Pretty much anything that involves the arts is something I enjoy doing. It gets me through the day and gives me a chance to express myself.
I have many friends who have come and gone, some who are even enemies now. Regardless, they've taught me a lot. I've learned to be more humble, tolerant, and kind, but also I've learned things like never to trust anyone completely off the bat, and to usually expect the worst. I'm generally pretty pessimistic and I think irrationally, but that's a nasty habit I'm trying to break. My intentions are good. That's something I must always remind myself and everyone else of. I have anxiety but I'm learning to control it better every day. This time a year ago it was impossible for me to socialize, but nowadays it's easier. Time mends everything.
I'm not really good at these self-describing things anymore. If you want to know me, ask me yourself. :3
Saturday, November 15, 2014, 6:28 PM
One year and one month later
I've been through more in the past year than I have in most of my life. My reality is a little shattered. I don't really feel like myself. I feel very out of touch with life. I'm hoping to get out of it soon. Now for the story of what I've dealt with....
I was standing inside the Firehouse, waiting at the register. It was around midday, so it was slow and I didn't really have anything to do. Someone approaches the door and I think to myself, "Finally, a customer." However, the person who came to visit that day was not a customer. He wanted to talk to the manager about working there. He apparently had already contacted them. He was a transfer from another state. His name is Bryce. Nothing could have prepared me for how fucked up my life was going to get because of this guy.
Bryce started working with us and was made a shift leader within a month. I wasn't really surprised, considering he was a GM at another store where he used to live and had worked for Firehouse Subs for 7 years. We got along really well. He got along really well with David, also. They liked the same music, and he liked anime just like I did. Firehouse was a big, happy family. Everyone loved everybody, and Bryce fit right in with us and everything was great. I got a raise to $7.50, and so did David. We didn't think things could get any better.
Bryce started mentioning us moving in with him and his girlfriend. I always wanted to move out of my parents house, and never really could because I couldn't afford it. Even with David's help, the cheapest apartments in my area were impossible. I considered it, but I always had a bad feeling in my gut about it. We would go over to Bryce's apartment and hang out with him and his girlfriend. They lived in an apartment complex right down the street from my parents house. They seemed nice, we all got along and joked around and had fun. It started to seem like a better idea, but when we would actually go to apartments and look at them, I would always have a really bad feeling in the back of my mind. It didn't feel right. I just ignored it, because my desire to move out of my parents house overpowered my anxiety about moving in with them.
Then, one day, all of a sudden, the owners of the store pulled Bryce, David, another crew member, Zach, and I aside to ask us a favor. They have another store. They decided to fire every member of their management and start anew. They wanted Bryce to be the GM, and David, Zach and I to become shift leaders. They gave us the option to say no, they weren't going to make us take on this new responsibility. It was really far away, and it would be a great challenge for us. However, there was a catch: they offered us a raise up to $8.50 for taking this new position. We thought it would be a good opportunity so we said yes, and we moved over the other store to become the new "management team".
It was a much.. longer store than Appling, which made it feel really big. At first I didn't like it, but at this point I've grown used to it and I feel like the old store is really tiny. We met a lot of new employees that were very different from the ones we were used to. As time passed, we got to know them and vice versa. It took them awhile to develop respect for us, however. Being a shift leader was challenging for me. I had to stand up to people and learn to communicate, something I have never really been forced to do. My anxiety made it tough for awhile, but I was slowly pulling through and improving my skills. David was a natural at it. Bryce was a good manager. Things were going smoothly. The store was increasing in business and customer satisfaction. We were transforming the new store into a huge success.
Then we found the apartment. It was a small two bedroom, and it barely fit all of our furniture. The day we signed the lease, I had this terrible feeling stirring in my stomach just as I had before. I still ignored it. I was excited, and I was even more sure that we could afford it with the raises that we got. We jumped right into it. We got it all set up very quickly, and our first night there we had all our friends over. Bryce and Hannah got along with them swimmingly. We had fun, and everything was going great at first. It was like a dream come true. I was finally out of my parents house, and starting my life with David. After the first few months of living there, though... we started to notice things that were really strange. I refuse to go into detail about any of it so I will just leave it at that. Strange.
David and I started to become really distressed and bitter towards them. The strange things that were going on were affecting our lives at the apartment. A lot of tension and anger built up. I could feel it coming from them, too. After 6 months of living with them, we saw their true colors... and left.
Now we are back at my moms house and moving into an apartment by ourselves next month. What a great year I've had. -____-
