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welcome
I'm Amy. I'm growing up. And this is my past, present, and future.
I know you'll come in the night like a thief.
But I’ve had some time alone to hone my lying technique.
I know you think that I’m someone you can trust.
But I’m scared I’ll get scared and I swear I’ll try to nail you back up.
So do you think that we could work out a psalm?
So I’ll know it's you and that it's over so I won't even try.
I know you'll come for the people like me.
But we all got wood and nails,
And talk dirt at hating factories.
profile
My name is Amy. I'm a Gemini. I'm 25 years old. I'm a struggling artist, and an overly opinionated martyr of my beliefs. My past experiences, no matter how petty or dramatic they were, molded me into who I am today. I'm still changing every day.
I'm an artist. I love to draw and make things in photoshop [such as this blogger layout]. I also love music; I dabble in piano a little bit. I only know how to play other songs, of course. Nothing original. I like to write as well. Pretty much anything that involves the arts is something I enjoy doing. It gets me through the day and gives me a chance to express myself.
I have many friends who have come and gone, some who are even enemies now. Regardless, they've taught me a lot. I've learned to be more humble, tolerant, and kind, but also I've learned things like never to trust anyone completely off the bat, and to usually expect the worst. I'm generally pretty pessimistic and I think irrationally, but that's a nasty habit I'm trying to break. My intentions are good. That's something I must always remind myself and everyone else of. I have anxiety but I'm learning to control it better every day. This time a year ago it was impossible for me to socialize, but nowadays it's easier. Time mends everything.
I'm not really good at these self-describing things anymore. If you want to know me, ask me yourself. :3
Sunday, November 8, 2009, 8:38 PM
Real fear.
My boyfriend was in Sweetwater, Tennessee, for 6 or 7 days. When he got home, I had my friend Cheltzie over, we had gone to the mall, when I got back I had a missed call from him, so, I called him back.
He sounded depressed. But we talked for awhile. I asked him what was wrong. "Nothing," he said, "I'll tell you later." I asked if it was about his mom. He said, "Yeah, don't worry about it, I'll tell you later." I started talking to Cheltzie. Then he yells it out.
"We're moving," he says.
My heart sunk. I had never in my life felt such a worse, terrifying feeling than when he told me that.
Back to Knoxville. Or Sweetwater. Over 300 miles away.
The funniest part is, we just repaired things. We were happy. We finally got our relationship straight.
And now, I'm losing the only person that has dealt with my shit for so long in.... well, ever.
I am so scared, and so lost.
What to do, what to do..
